{"id":883,"date":"2007-08-07T20:50:20","date_gmt":"2007-08-08T01:50:20","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.sequence-inc.com\/fraudfiles\/2007\/08\/07\/new-hedge-funnies-post-offers-the-secret-to-eternal-life\/"},"modified":"2007-10-08T09:45:01","modified_gmt":"2007-10-08T14:45:01","slug":"new-hedge-funnies-post-offers-the-secret-to-eternal-life","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.sequenceinc.com\/fraudfiles\/new-hedge-funnies-post-offers-the-secret-to-eternal-life\/","title":{"rendered":"New Hedge Funnies post offers the secret to eternal life"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>In an exiting new development, Hedge Funnies reports (satirically) that GNC will begin offering a product that will<a href=\"http:\/\/hedgefunnies.com\/2007\/08\/07\/gnc-to-begin-selling-fountain-of-youth\/\"> give users eternal life<\/a>.<\/p>\n<blockquote><p>But this well-informed and extremely healthy employee told us something revolutionary \u2014 he has heard from sources well-placed in the GNC chain of command that the company is shortly going to roll out its \u201cGNC Fountain of Youth\u201d product.The employee said the following:<\/p>\n<p>\u201cAlthough, asterisk, this product is not regulated by the FDA and it\u2019s not intended to cure or reduce any disease, the product will allow users to live forever.\u201d<\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p>I believe they&#8217;re going to sell it via GNC&#8217;s new multi-level marketing unit. What better way to sell secret potions?<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>In an exiting new development, Hedge Funnies reports (satirically) that GNC will begin offering a product that will give users eternal life. But this well-informed and extremely healthy employee told us something revolutionary \u2014 he has heard from sources well-placed [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":"","jetpack_publicize_message":"","jetpack_publicize_feature_enabled":true,"jetpack_social_post_already_shared":false,"jetpack_social_options":{"image_generator_settings":{"template":"highway","default_image_id":0,"font":"","enabled":false},"version":2}},"categories":[5],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-883","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-fraud-news-stories"],"jetpack_publicize_connections":[],"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","jetpack_shortlink":"https:\/\/wp.me\/p6Z0e-ef","jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.sequenceinc.com\/fraudfiles\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/883","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.sequenceinc.com\/fraudfiles\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.sequenceinc.com\/fraudfiles\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.sequenceinc.com\/fraudfiles\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.sequenceinc.com\/fraudfiles\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=883"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.sequenceinc.com\/fraudfiles\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/883\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.sequenceinc.com\/fraudfiles\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=883"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.sequenceinc.com\/fraudfiles\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=883"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.sequenceinc.com\/fraudfiles\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=883"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}